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| Touch Quotes
The good news is that even if we haven’t had too much good touching as infants, we can still take in good touch at a later age. Indeed, this can go further. By learning positive responses to being touched, we can actually develop new neural pathways in the brain and catch up on experiencing good sensuality. So embarking on a series of touch games is a way of feeding information into our brains that we can use when appropriate. We can expand our knowledge and our range of sensual experience in this way. (Anne Hooper, Ultimate Sexual Touch, p.24)
We now know, through work with autistic children, that it is possible to introduce a human being to touch experience in order to change his or her perception of the world. The logical conclusion is that we may still be able to socialize unruly adults with some intense touch experience. Being kissed, cuddled, and stroked as babies is therefore vital to how responsive as partners we are in later life. (Anne Hooper, Ultimate Sexual Touch, p.24)
If you deprive an animal of touch, the animals become literally sick both in the mind - they develop a lot of anxiety - and also they live less... they're less healthy in the long term.
(Katerina Fotoloulou, Professor of Psychodynamic Neuroscience, BBC, 3m50s, posted 5 October 2020, accessed 7 October 2020)
Touch is a basic need in the lives of beings. We depend on touch to survive at many levels. Humans and animals—we all crave it, need it, appreciate it and use it effectively for our benefit. At least, when we are babies and at the very beginnings of our lives, we are intimately connected to our mothers and rely on touch, smell and physical closeness for not only our survival, but also for the optimization of our health and well-being. It is later in life that some cultures have a tendency to move away from physical touch, but this is not necessarily due to the lack of a need for it, but rather as a curbing and civilizing of our animal instincts, which humans have been considering in the last centuries mostly as “lowly” or as “far away from ‘godly.’”...
Societies, as communities of people aiming to improve our lives and our relationships, should try to relax more and more as we advance into the 21st century. Massage should not belong or be restricted to a profession and it should not be necessary to have a “license” to touch a person with warmth and kindness. The phenomena of energy transmission cannot be fully understood nor can it be ignored, much like the phenomena of love, connectedness and passion.
(Naoli Vinaver, What Is a Birth without Loving Touch? first published 2009, accessed 29 September 2020)
Make touching and cuddling a priority [to strengthen your relationship]. Usually, when couples first marry, this happens naturally. You can often identify newlyweds by their tendency to touch each other – holding hands, sitting close, touching arms, kissing – just as you can spot “oldyweds” by how little they touch. Mothers of babies and young children often feel less need for physical contact with their partners; their little ones provide so much opportunity for touching and cuddling that day’s end leaves them “touch fulfilled.” So, here’s a simple tip: Make it a point to touch your spouse more often. It doesn’t take much – a pat, a hug, a shoulder massage – and the good feeling it produces for both of you far outreaches the effort. (Elizabeth Pantley, Hidden Messages, p.91)
We need more than just sex! Part 1 Pleasure alone does not necessarily bring extended happiness. The reason sex can equate with greater long-term happiness is because of the accompanying cuddling. It's more than just sex. Affectionate touch connects sex with well-being. See here, here and here.
We need more than just sex! Part 2 A post-coital cuddle boosts women's sexual enjoyment by 30%. Cuddling is as important to a woman's pleasure as foreplay. It is the easiest way to improve your relationship. A cuddle after sex makes men feel better too, and increases chances of a repeat encounter. See here, here, here.
The Human Touch (by Spencer Michael Free)
’Tis the human touch
in this world that counts,
The touch of your hand and mine,
Which means far more
to the fainting heart
Than shelter and bread and wine.
For shelter is gone
when the night is o’er,
And bread lasts only a day.
But the touch of the hand
And the sound of the voice
Sing on in the soul always.
Ophelia Deroy, a philosopher at Ludvig Maximillians University in Munich, believes touch is the most fundamental sense of all.
"It is a sense that we can never switch off. It seems to ground us in reality," she says. "We can use touch to connect with other humans in a myriad of ways - we can be reassuring or draw someone's attention to something, or surprise them, or express affection, friendliness or love." (BBC, posted and accessed 5 October 2020)
The sensation of human touch is disappearing in a computer age, and with it part of human nature... (Will Self, BBC, posted 30 January 2015, accessed 9 April 2020)
Love consists in this. That two solitudes protect and touch and greet each other.
(Rainer Maria Rilke)
In cultures, there is a basic inverse relationship between physical violence and physical pleasure. If violence is high, pleasure is low, and conversely, if pleasure is high, violence is low. This applies to both primitive cultures and modern industrial nations.
If we accept the theory that the lack of sufficient somatosensory pleasure [affectionate touch and body movement in infancy or adolescence] is a principal cause of violence, we can work toward promoting pleasure and encouraging affectionate interpersonal relationships as a means of combatting aggression. We should give high priority to body pleasure in the context of meaningful human relationships. Such body pleasure is very different from promiscuity, which reflects a basic inability to experience pleasure...
The solution to physical violence is physical pleasure experienced within the context of meaningful human relationships.
For many people, a fundamental moral principle is the rejection of creeds, policies, and behaviors that inflict pain, suffering and deprivation upon our fellow humans. This principle needs to be extended: We should seek not just an absence of pain and suffering, but also the enhancement of pleasure, the promotion of affectionate human relationships, and the enrichment of human experience.
(See James W. Prescott, Body Pleasure and the Origins of Violence, 1975; accessed online 16 June 2021)
In some ways it [talk] can offer support, but it leaves out the body. How do you comfort little babies? You rock them, you hold them. And even as adults, when something bad happens to us – that is our primary source of comfort. You don’t have to talk, you don’t have to explain. You can just feel ventral to ventral contact [a hug], body context, that is such a profound comforting for us as primates.
(Bessel van der Kolk, psychiatrist and pioneering PTSD researcher, author of The Body Keeps the Score, cited at The Guardian, posted and accessed 29 July 2021)
When we touch gently, when we press our faces together, when we close our eyes in trust and ecstasy, we are saying, “You are secure. You are loved. We are safe. We are in this together.” (Sy Montgomery, cited in The Guardian, posted and accessed 1 September 2021)
"First learn the technique; then forget it. Then just feel and move by feeling. When you learn deeply, ninety percent of the work is done by love, ten percent by the technique. By just the very touch, a loving touch, something relaxes in the body."
(Osho, cited here, posted December 2018, accessed 7 September 2021)
Culture of Touch
4 Kinds of