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| The Daring Adventure of Intimacy & Parenting
Here is a story (shortened from the start and end of the movie Spy Kids):
Ingrid [mother]: Once upon a time... there was a man and a woman... And they were both spies... Her mission was to take him out [kill him]... but when the moment finally came... to carry out her mission... she couldn't do it... And they fell in love... and they decided that, together... they would embark... on the most dangerous mission of all time... They decided to marry... On her wedding day... she felt like she would rather brave... a thousand deadly missions... than go through with what she was about to attempt.
Carmen [daughter]: Why is that?
Ingrid: Well, marriage is a mission so complex... that only the most courageous and slightly insane need apply. There's such an amazing series of obstacles... one has to navigate to keep a marriage together - much less family - that it frightened even her... a hardened and experienced secret agent. But when she saw him... standing there with no doubt whatsoever... so assured of his decision... so enamoured with what they were about to do... she took his hand... looked deep into his eyes... and said the two most dangerous... most trusting words you can say to anyone.
Ingrid: She said, "I do."... Then the problems started... On their own, each agent was notorious... but together, they made tempting targets... So, they retired... settled down... had a few kids. In a way, they exchanged... one life of adventure for another... trading espionage for parenthood - a mysterious and compelling mission in its own right. And they're better off. The end.
Carmen: No "happily ever after"?
Ingrid: I said they were better off...
Carmen: Spy work...that's easy. Keeping a family together... that's difficult. And that's the mission worth fighting for.
Elite Forces Parenting
The Voices of Mothers
by Peggy O'Mara [external link]